The Republican PR machine reminds me of the con man who would stand on soap boxes on the dusty Main Street in western towns years ago, shouting to the gathered group of curious onlookers about how his Miracle Tonic would cure everything from baldness to pneumonia.
As they embark on their Kill Medicare Snake Oil Campaign, these Republican political pawns of the wealthy, knowing full well that the budget they passed killing Medicare is opposed by over 70% of Americans AND over 50% of Republicans, are prepared to step up on those soap boxes across the nation and sell their snake oil to what they see as a gullible public.
PlanetPOV has used its vast undercover network to provide the following transcript from the first trial of this campaign by the GOP in Sheep’s Mount, Wyoming.
“Step right up! What I’m holding in my hand here may look like poison, it may taste like poison, it may act like poison but, my friends, this is the only thing that will save you from the doom that’s coming! That’s right, the end is near and the only thing that can save you is this amazing, miracle elixir that we call, “Republican Ryan’s Remarkable Remedy”! Just swallow this and all your worries will drift away! No more worries about making doctor’s appointments and say goodbye to those annoying operations and treatments!
My friends, budget deficits want to kill your granny but the ingredients in Republican Ryan’s Remarkable Remedy, which include only the finest hand-picked tax cuts for the wealthy and the essence of denied hopes and dreams for the middle class and poor, will take care of all of that before you can say” The Black Plague”!
To you older folks I say, don’t be a slave to reason or instinct! Don’t let concern for other generations make up your mind for you! I swear on the life of my own sweet elderly mother, this potion won’t kill anyone over 55! Take it today and save yourself! You show your love for your grandkids in so many other ways, from hard candy to scratchy woolen sweaters, you do enough for them so protecting their standard of living and their health when they’re your age is just spoiling them. You are the last generation of seniors that really deserve health care, you’re far more special than your kids, your grandkids or the families they’ll have! Don’t be shy to stand from the highest walker and shout, “I’m old! I’m selfish! Get used to it!”
To you middle aged and younger folks out there, don’t think about what I just said, think about what I’m saying now! How can you know for sure that Medicare will be there for you when you get old? If you take Republican Ryan’s Remarkable Remedy, you will know for sure, I guarantee it! You may ask, “How does Republican Ryan’s Remarkable Remedy work on impotence and Medicare?” Let’s start with Medicare. Here’s what it’s gonna do, if you buy this formula, you’ll get a $15, 000 voucher to pay any private insurance company for health insurance. Now, you might ask, “What if the only policies I can find ten years from now are $25,000 a year and I can’t afford the extra $10,000 in cash? What if the only policies I can find at $15,000 have a $10,000 or $20,000 deductible? What if very few doctors are willing to take the payment amount provided and I’d have to drive hours to see a doctor…but what if I’m too ill or old to drive?” To all of those questions I say, don’t worry about all of that, it’ll make you sick then you’ll really have something to worry about.
So step right up today, it only costs only one thin vote! Hey, you’re too young to vote, get away kid, ya bother me! The rest of you, don’t wait before it’s too late, buy Republican Ryan’s Remarkable Remedy now! You won’t see another deal like this in your lifetime, I mean it!”