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whatsthatsound On July - 11 - 2011


While scientists remain puzzled as to the cause of  the dramatic decline in honeybee populations in North America and elsewhere, some are speculating the cause may very much be human related; however, not technological, but  philosophical. It appears that “Randism”, a trend that has recently exploded on the American political landscape may similarly have caught on among our bee brethren. It seems that the reason for the decline of hive populations is that many bees are now practicing “the virtue of selfishness”, keeping the nectar they collect for themselves and not returning to the hives they emerged from. These bees consider the notion that they should return for the benefit of the whole colony “evil altruism” and look down upon the “Hive-ists” who would act for a goal larger than themselves. They argue that “there is no such thing as a species” and that it all comes down to individual bees and their pursuit of their own happiness. When it is pointed out to them that this could result in the extinction of honey bees and have cataclysmic results on worldwide crops, they scoff and say, “and this is my problem how?”

Meanwhile, more religious-minded bees are concerned about how to carry on in the aftermath of what they regard as “The Great Rapture” that has decimated their populations. “Left Bee-hive”, the bee adaptation of the “Left Behind” series of books by Tim LaHaye and Jerry Jenkins, paints a bleak picture of life on earth after the Chosen Bees have been taken up to their Maker.

So, will it be Rand that the bees turn to, or the Good Book? “Why should I care?”, a distraught bee who agreed to be interviewed for this article lamented. “It’s so hopeless that I just may go off somewhere and sting someone!”

Written by whatsthatsound

Writer, Illustrator, Curmudgeon. Ferret Owner. Tokyoite, formerly Ohioan. Much nicer in person.

41 Responses so far.

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  1. Questinia says:

    Apropos I recently found about a hundred honey bees buzzing on my lamb’s ears and lavender. Didn’t know I had them.

    So, I just may get bee-hive boxes. Only I hope they aren’t Rand-bees cause then they’ll want their hives to go condo and have concierge service. I’m not up to that.

    • whatsthatsound says:

      Q! How lovely to see you here!
      Oh, please start making honey, that would be perfect. I am into honey liqueurs, like Benedictine and Drambuie. I mix up my own aloe/honey liqueur, and I found a recipe for Drambuie online, so as soon as you send me some jars of your very own honey I’ll mix up a batch for the both of us!

  2. Emerald1943 says:

    Love it, love it! Thanks for the good belly laugh! I needed that today!

  3. escribacat says:

    U funny, whats!!

  4. whatsthatsound says:

    Randism’s a dead idea,
    as dead as dead can be,
    First it killed America
    and now it’s killing bees!

  5. whatsthatsound says:

    btw, if anyone is curious where the artwork concept came from, this is the original cover for “Atlas Shrugged” in its initial release.

  6. AdLib says:

    Damn greedy bugs, all just want to be Beelionaires!

  7. kesmarn says:

    “It’s Probably ‘Bee'” Sting

  8. ADONAI says:

    If this entire post was just an excuse to get in the “Left Bee-Hive” joke, I applaud you sir. I’m still laughing. And I hate puns.

  9. Greta42 says:

    Hi whatsthatsounds -- I thoroughly enjoyed your article, giving me my first laughs of the day. Your analogies were quite on target with the Randian bees narrowing view of their ‘community’ until it disappeared and only the individual bees remained solidly self-interested to the detriment of everything else. An apt description of the state of our current social/political scene.

    • whatsthatsound says:

      thanks Greta! I came up with this idea just posting some random thoughts on a couple posts here, but the response was very good, so I felt like I should expand it into a full blown piece . Please feel free to pass it on to anyone you think would enjoy it. I’d love for it to get a little “buzz”!

      • jkkFL says:

        K whatsie, after the above closing comment- I nominate your skinny behind
        as the target for the distraught bee. 😉

        • whatsthatsound says:

          I’ll have you know that I have a perfectly shaped behind, jkk, and perfectly stingable, not that I’m volunteering for anything.

          • jkkFL says:

            That scrawny excuse for a butt???..
            Go back to the Oprah/God painting and check the knobby knees- and the fact that Rosie- who weighs a pound soaking wet- with Hershey bars in both pockets, covers front and back!!! 😉

            • jkkFL says:

              @Khirad- been there; done That??? 🙂

            • jkkFL says:

              @wts: Go for it- we could all use a laugh.
              Things have been a bit serious these days!!


              Not a “wishful” painting! 😉

            • whatsthatsound says:

              I’m just almost ready to take a shot of my proudest possession and moon you with it right here on this site!
              You would be silenced, you silliest of persons!

            • Khirad says:

              I like big buzz and I can not lie
              You other buzzers can’t deny
              That when a queen walks in with an itty bitty waist
              And a round thing in your compound eyes
              You get stung.

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