GOP

"By just taking healthcare away from 35 million people, we could lower premiums and provide less coverage for 750,000 people! It's a win-win!" Satan smirked, doing his Martin Shkreli impersonation.

Trump never exhibited any of the basic skills of a skilled negotiator, it's only been about using the lowest, crudest and most unprincipled tactic that criminal types have in their arsenal...extortion.

In the pursuit of an antidote and counter-programming to the daily ugliness from Trump, we introduce The Anti-Trump Film Festival, presenting clips from a variety of films that confront the Trumpesque themes of racism, oppression, corruption, etc. and affirm the traits that are best in human beings.

Trump's begrudging statement today about the horrifying events in Charlottesville was delivered stiffly like a disinterested 5th grader reading out loud to his class, with none of the emotion and vehemence of his attacks on the press, Nordstrom and Kathy Griffin.

Trump's success has been based on the cult of personality and while he's been right that cultists can't be convinced by reason out of believing in their cult leader, they can grow discouraged when The Promised Land that cult leader promised only he could deliver (and only for them, "the believers"), doesn't come.

According to sources close to Trump, he will spend the rest of his time in office, immersed in a virtual reality where all Americans look at him with love and trust and his hands appear much bigger.

Republicans have so far ignored what Americans want, time will tell if they've grown so desperate, they may consider representing the wishes of their constituents.

McConnell provided an estimate from The Heritage Foundation that his amendment to a repeal of Obamacare would reduce the deficit by $4 trillion over ten years, thanks to huge savings in social programs as 50% of America's population dies prematurely.

In the nation's capitol, one thing is guaranteed while Donald Trump is Resident of the United States: whatever can go wrong, will.

Obliviously, in his pursuit to keep conning his supporters to stay behind him, Trump has been building a "big beautiful" wall between himself and the majority of Americans since he was inaugurated and it's only getting taller.