Donald Trump

"When Donald first told me that he wanted me to be on his SCOTUS, I have to admit that I misunderstood and told him that I had a headache," Melania explained. "But once he explained to me that SCOTUS stands for 'Supreme Court Of Trump's Ultrahot Spouse', I was very flattened. Or is it 'flattered'?"

To soothe his fragile nerves, Donald Trump listens to his special, "The Best, Most, Magnificent Playlist, Ever in the History of Man, Believe Me!". Fortunately, we've got a copy right here!

PlanetPOV is summarizing this week's news using unrelated YouTube videos. While in sync with today's level of journalism, we hope you'll find it as informative as it is entertaining. Thank you!

There are big difference between the UK and the US (and not just the windshield vs. "windscreen" crap) in demographics, politics and the fact that Donald Trump is not an organization of sovereign states that our country belongs to (yet).

Republicans have been lobbying Trump to change his campaign persona into a "more presidential" one, to go by a script and stop saying incendiary things. In other words, they want Trump to pull a bigger con on the American public than he has been, deceiving voters into thinking he's not the sociopath he really is.

"Let's make America great again and maybe we can start to do that by basing our elections on something truly American, a mafia style threat that says, 'You didn't see anything, you didn't hear anything! Vote Trump!'"

Donald Trump is not an idiot, he's not campaigning in as improvised a way as it may seem, he has a very focused strategy...

"It sure beats having Hillary as President," said Senator Jeff Sessions while wading knee deep through the bloody carnage of tens of thousands of dismembered Alabama citizens. "Can you imagine what her liberal policies would do to the people of this country?!"

The GOP Elite are so worried about having a nominee they can't control who will lose the General Election...that they would hand the nomination to a candidate they think they can control who has lost terribly in the Republican Primaries. So, replace the big loser...with an even bigger loser.

Tomorrow's primary in Wisconsin could be a remarkable turning point for the Republican party. If the results match the polling of the last week and Cruz beats Trump, the most despised Republican politician by Republicans could end up the likely nominee of their party.