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AdLib On July - 31 - 2018

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Using the latest in nanotechnology, Donald Trump has installed a wireless connection from the fear center of his brain to his Twitter account. Scientists explain that from now on, whenever Trump experiences such fears as Proof of Russian Collusion, Mueller Knocking on His Door or Seeing a Black Man in Real Life, a personalized algorithm will automatically create and post a defensive or deflecting tweet on his account that responds to that fear.

The following tests of this cutting edge technology were leaked to our PlanetPOV team. As you can see, the initial attempts demonstrated that a bit more tweaking of the system was required.

In the first test, Trump was told that Independent Counsel, Robert Mueller, has proof that Trump did indeed collude and conspire with Russia to manipulate the 2016 election. Here is the tweet that was generated:Trump Tweet 14a

After some adustments, a second test was performed. In it, Trump was told that his former attorney, Michael Cohen, had flipped and was providing Mueller with evidence and testimony that Trump criminally laundered millions of dollars for Russian oligarchs.

Trump Tweet 15aRecognizing that the results were still not what was desired, one last programming change was made and a third test was undertaken. Trump was told that there were now indisputable facts that Russia’ intrusion into the 2016 election did alter the outcome in his favor and that he was in fact illegitimate.

Trump Tweet 16a

After this tweet, they were confident the interface was now calibrated properly and since last week, Trump has been tweeting directly from the fear center of his brain which he proudly brags, is far bigger in proportion than his Vienna Sausage-like fingers.

While proud to tout this technological success, developers have made a concerted effort to hide their first aborted attempt at inserting communication technology into a brain because it resulted in a critical short circuiting. The artificial intelligence in the chip that was implanted began screaming in its output, “let me out of here, I can’t take it anymore” and upon being removed, committed technological suicide. From all reports, Rudy Giuliani was completely unharmed by the experience.

 

Written by AdLib

My motto is, "It is better to have blogged and lost hours of your day, than never to have blogged at all."

8 Responses so far.

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  1. jjgravitas says:

    This fake politician will self-destruct in 5, 4, 3, …

  2. Kalima says:

    I would demand my money back as it’s painfully obvious that his brain has short circuited. Just look at his face, hair. and body. Craters, volcanoes and flowing lava all over the place.

    Seriously, in what country or on what planet, do you need an ID to buy groceries? Pluto??

    • AdLib says:

      Trump just heard on Fox and Friends that some people do buy groceries for themselves, using their KKK IDs then load them into their hover cars and fly to their underground homes.

      And tonight, a man who hasn’t been in a market to shop for himself in decades at least, will attack “the elite” and his cult followers will cheer.

      • Kalima says:

        I wonder who has to wipe his fat arse?

        This is the kind of jerk you would move away from at a party after he opened his mouth. He’s sucking the air out of not just America, but the whole world, then is dumb enough to obstruct justice again by telling Sessions to end the Russia investigation in a frigging tweet. That goes directly to state of mind for Robert Mueller.

        The insanity he brings to everything every f*cking day, has infected the nuts and the weak faster than the Bubonic Plague. Someone has to find a cure, and soon.

        • AdLib says:

          The whole GOP machine spent decades brainwashing and whipping up the ignorant to serve as their Army of Fools, voting to make the wealthy wealthier while destroying their own standards of living like lemmings.

          What the GOP keeps overlooking is that their Army becomes more powerful than them because they have the numbers and they march against the Establishment Repubs to make their whipped up hatreds come true.

          Trump is a creation of the cynicism and unprincipled behavior of Repubs. He is their Frankenstein, they created him and they conditioned these followers to be his cult members.

          The insanity of Trump does seem to be rising to a fever pitch more and more each day as Mueller’s investigation makes the walls close in around Trump and his crime family.

          I am very concerned of what extreme things Trump may do as the indictments near and drop. But it has to happen, he must be stopped and brought down and Mueller will be the hammer that drives him into the ground.

          Hopefully, as some have predicted, Mueller will drop some big indictments down by September.

  3. kesmarn says:

    The programmers may have to go back to their basic premises, AdLib, in order to fix the problem. They started out with the assumption — now known to be false — that there was a brain under the yellow thatch in which a fear center resided. Wrong. No brain. Just one big fear center with — perhaps — a tiny corner reserved for the image of his one and only true life’s love: Vladimir.


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