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Kalima On November - 29 - 2009

A friend sent this to my inbox this morning and I thought I would like to share it with you. I think that we all need to laugh a little more, it’s good for us I hear.

It’s hard to read I know but when I tried the larger version, it took the whole page, so here it what it says.

Gonna be a bear.

“In this life I am a woman. In my next life I’d

like to come back as a bear. When you’re a

bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing

but sleep for six months, I could deal with


Before you hibernate, you’re supposed to eat

yourself stupid. I could deal with that too.

When you are a girl bear, you birth your

children (who are the size of walnuts) while

you’re sleeping and wake up to partially grown,

cute, cuddly cubs. I could definitely deal with


If you’re a mama bear, everyone knows you

mean business. You swat anyone who

bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of

line, you swat them too. I could deal with


If you’re a bear, your mate EXPECTS  you to

wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you

will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yup, gonna be a bear!”


Written by Kalima

Long time resident of Tokyo --- "Where is this woman I once knew so well? Memories fading or hurtling by like a howling wind at a speed I can't fathom or define. A star hangs like a teardrop from her eye, quivering but never falling. I search the empty corridors of my soul in hopes of catching just another glimpse of who she once presumed herself to be. Where is this woman who trod with such certainty, where is she now? I mourn her passing as another dawn breaks in my restless heart."

7 Responses so far.

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  1. bitohistory says:

    The line about the Mama bear swatting the cubs is so true. I was living in the Upper Peninsula of Mich. at the time. One morning on the way to work a Mama Bear and two cubs were slow trotting across the road we stopped, turned off the truck and watched them. Those little cubs are cute and comical. Seconds later we heard this wailing from the woods, Mama comes running back across the road. Out comes another cub from the wood with Mama swatting the guy across the butt! Reminded me when I was a tyke with my own mother.

    “I told you to stay with me! Now get across the road!!”
    Quite the memory for me.
    We laughed about that all day at work.

    • Mogamboguru says:

      Hi, BigDogMom!

      In indian legends, bears are but another human tribe.

      Yes, sometimes bears act and behave so human-like, that it is difficult to see any differences between them and us -- except, that we wage war at one another, but bears don’t.

      So who of the two tribes is, in fact, the smarter one?

  2. choicelady says:

    Thanks Kalima -- this definitely works for me! When the days get short, I do want to eat and sleep much more. When I lived where it snowed (a LOT) I got a great deal of exercise keeping the sidewalks clean, but now -- just want to be warm and cozy. But -- NO Snuggies for me! It’s the back of my neck and back of my back that get cold, so what’s the point? In the early 8os I used to have one of those quilt things with arm holes -- problem was it was like a sleeping bag at the bottom that made it REALLY bad for sudden needs to get to the lav. I’m thinking a combo with “footies” would be much smarter. But I’m too lazy to patent it. If any of you do,please share the proceeds with the Idea Lady? In the meantime, I will sip soup, curl up with my quilt, read a book, and enjoy the season for what it is. Bear time.

    • Mogamboguru says:

      Hi, choicelady.

      To keep myself warm in the cold, I would wear a sleeping bag upside down, after I cut holes for my head and my arms into it, to keep myself warm, if I were you.

      But I leave it up to you to decide, if you prefer to wear the zipper at the front or, rather, at the rear, to further improve your convenience…


    • Kalima says:

      LOL, from one bear to another, cheers!

      They have those quilted things with armholes here too but after falling in a heap every time the phone or doorbell rang, hopping like a 7 year old in a sack race and for those desperate trips to the little girl’s room which almost ended in disaster, I gave ours away to a homeless man I found sleeping with my cats in the garage one morning.

      Used to living in cold countries like Germany and England, I became an expert on layering. Two underpants, two long sleeved vests, leggings, two pair of sweats, two sweaters, two pair of socks and a wooly hat and that was just to get warm in bed.

      Here in Tokyo the winters are milder but we do get our moments when the chill hits the bones. Those times deserve a little extra padding and lots of hot cocoa with mini marshmallows floating on the top.

      Enjoy curling up with your good book, your soup and your quilt, enjoy bear time, because before we know it, the heat will be on us in full force to make us wish for the colder days of semi hibernation again.

  3. Kalima says:

    Sorry I missed you BDM and yes, the sun goes down about the same time here too and hubby and I hibernate from the end of December to about the end February, the coldest time of the year over here.

    This year I discovered “Snuggies” on sale over here and although hubby insist he will not be walking around wearing a blanket with holes for his head and arms, I know he will be wearing his when the cold January winds start to seep into the cracks of our 30 year old house. I’m smiling as I think about it. 🙂

  4. BigDogMom says:

    Thanks Kalima, this was wonderful, I swear my hubby and I become bears in the winter here. The sun goes down so early, 4:30pm, here that you feel that it’s time to go to bed at 7:00pm.

    Since we both work outside, lack of sunshine really effects us, we sleep and eat more just like bears!

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