Donald Trump is reportedly recruiting a phantom army to counter the endless hordes of invaders he sees.

Millions of fraudulent voters (obviously, phantoms all), with the power to become invisible, will have little chance against Trump’s Phantom Army (they can see stuff that isn’t even real – how cool is that?). Several hundred billion people (give or take) who want to take “all” of your guns away, will be annihilated (I’ve never met one; they’ve got to be phantoms.)

Antifa has accused T.P.A. of not existing. Look who’s talking!

Trump has certified that there are no phantoms in his administration; as released by his new, obviously phantom, Press Secretary.

Trump was asked if phantom armies exist: he said, “Of course not, but being non-existent and insubstantial, like my record of achievement, is a feature and not an issue. How better to fight non-existent foes than with a phantom army? We’re bound to win – they’re already dead!”

Evil Clowns in the Senate claim that they are being short-shrifted – that no one is more zombie-like than they. As McConnell made this statement, his minions shrieked hideously, and swore to investigate; as they beat on tom-toms fashioned from human skulls and danced wildly through the night. It was a sight to see; which, unfortunately, was invisible.

Sucks, don’t it?

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Air Force brat. My dad was shepherd to a bunch of B-52's; the GI's called that place "20 Minutes From Armageddon;" because a missile launched in East Germany would pop over our heads twenty minutes later. That put me in some of the best schools anywhere. I wrote in the Press Office of a powerful, charismatic Midwestern Governor. I dabble in graphic arts. My 50+ entertainment sites get a few million visits, and I have stopped counting the fans, likes, and shares, per year. I've rambled the world, hitched around the continent (counter-clockwise). Climbed a couple of teeners, been to a couple of thousand rock, blues, and jazz concerts. I was at a free concert on Telegraph Avenue, Berkeley, CA with about 350,000 freaks and hippies; and other festivals. I won a writing contest when I was six. It was a Poe-like horror story taken from an account of a mining disaster. I had already been reading Edgar Allan Poe (which may explain a lot). I could read before I could talk. I implemented some of the first client/server, TCP-IP networks (the Internet) at many of the world's largest corporations. I know a half-dozen programming languages, and have implemented and administered many network operating systems. Right now I build ebikes, and lithium batteries from scratch. I was taught that race and ethnicity don't set us apart. I think that the best thing that could happen in this country would be if a woman were to be elected President of the United States. I admire President Obama more than any man in history, save one.

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Very clever, Steppenwolf! Enjoyed it!