Trump Cosby

Comedian Bill Cosby held a stunning press announcement this morning that he would be hosting a fundraiser for Republican Presidential candidate, Donald Trump.

In the opening of his announcement, Cosby stated, “I know how it feels to be famous and wrongly accused by women of abusing them, believe me, it’s a tough pill to swallow,” Cosby announced to the cringe of attending journalists. “I love women just as Mr. Trump does, if they only knew how much, they’d be knocked out.”

When informed that Cosby was now backing him and will be holding a fundraiser for him, Trump happily greeted the news. “Now here’s a man who knows that women exaggerate abuse. You give ’em a little push, just a little push with your hand or your penis and they act like  something horrible’s been done to them. They get worse just trying to get on my plane, believe me!”

At his press conference, Cosby went on to explain his newfound support of Donald Trump. “When I heard of the accusations made against Mr. Trump and his campaign manager, my reaction was identical to Mr. Trump’s. First, I denied that anything happened and said that the woman who made the charge was delusional. Then, when proof emerged, I changed my story and admitted something happened but placed the blame squarely on the shoulders of who was responsible…the woman who caused these things to happen to her. In this era, shouldn’t we take personal responsibility for what happens to us when we’re not wealthy or famous?”

After taking a moment to wink at a female journalist in attendance, Cosby continued, “Let’s face it, that lady reporter’s arm was dressed provocatively, her arm was asking to be pulled, you can see in the video how brazen it was, the way it was attached to her body right next to a breast and how it dangled out wantonly in front of Mr. Trump and Corey Lewandowski . If she didn’t want her arm to be pulled, why was it extending from her body?”

Cosby dabbed an imaginary tear from his eye. “What really gets me are the real victims out there of sexual abuse. Just because you’re famous, when you assault a woman, the media portrays you as a criminal. It’s not fair to ruin the life and reputation of someone who’s famous because of a rumor or indisputable video evidence. What happened to our justice system? Isn’t everyone supposed to be innocent until proven guilty?  It’s like justice in this country has been lured into a hotel penthouse by promises of helping it’s career then after drinking a strangely bitter drink, becomes dizzy then wakes up the next morning with its clothes on wrong and forgetting everything that happened the night before. It’s an outrage!”

Refusing to answer any questions from reporters, Cosby wrapped up his announcement, “So, to show my solidarity with Donald Trump at this time when he too is undergoing this unfair persecution by women who claim to be victimized by him and his campaign, I’m going to host a fundraiser for him which I’m calling, ‘Preventing Erroneous and Reckless Victimizing and Slander’, ‘PERVS’. I’m no novice at contributing money but this time it’s not to keep the person who’s getting it to stay quiet,” Cosby joked.

Cosby went on to say that admission to the Trump fundraiser would be $5,000 for men but free for women as long as they agreed to a two drink minimum.

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pinkpantherozAdLibKillgoreTroutgyp46Kalima Recent comment authors
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KillgoreTrout
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KillgoreTrout
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I sometimes wonder if Trump really wants the presidency. It does seem like he’s doing everything he can to lose the election.
I wonder if he started his campaign as a joke, then got caught up in all his popularity among the RWers. Maybe he has said to himself, “Hey, I might just win this thing.”

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pinkpantheroz
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KT, have been thinking the same thing! He keeps getting more and more obnoxious, the GOP/TP fools lap it up, and the media love it!

He really should now fire a gun down 5th Avenue!

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gyp46
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gyp46

It is such a wonderful feeling to find another who is ‘simpatico’ with you in life, these two sincerely do belong together, possibly they met at a party in the ’60s where Quaaludes were on the menu and young women were the edible foods. Seems their views do coincide completely as far as the fairer sex is concerned. Don’t know about how the majority of women in America feel about Cosby but polls have climbed over 70% unfavorable for the ‘Hairman’, bye bye Thumper in November!

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Kalima
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Love this, AdLib. Thought April Fool’s Day had come early but it’s not far fetched after all.

Trump is having a very bad week that just became worse. If I didn’t know better I would swear that he is fully aware of his limited knowledge about everything to do with domestic policy as well as being clueless about foreign policy so he has nothing that would credit him on becoming the nominee for the WH. It’s almost as if he is deliberately blowing his own chances. It baffles me why any woman with an ounce of self respect would vote for this disgustingly ignorant man. Then again, this is Donald. He lives to win, so why crucify himself with women voters so close to the convention? Is he really that bloody dumb?

I loved these two stories. One where Anderson Cooper nails his answer as being from a 5 year old, and the other about Trumo’s grammar being that of an 11 year old. That about sums him up for me, and the fact that he uses women as decoration for his arm to deflect the fact that he is such an ugly looking man with a very bad hair piece hiding his rotting brain cells.

I wonder how many abortions Trump has or hasn’t payed for in his “privileged white” life? Did Daddy, the flaming racist pay for them?

Your article was so convincing that it was scary to think that some men are actually thinking, and in some cases saying out loud, the things you wrote.

As for Bill Cosby, I will never get over the shock I felt when someone I had admired and laughed at for so many years had abused so many women and then denied it for decades.
—-

Watch Donald Trump respond to being called a 5-year-old by acting like a 5-year-old.

https://newrepublic.com/minutes/132229/watch-donald-trump-respond-called-5-year-old-acting-like-5-year-old

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I strongly disagree with the level of vocabulary comparison between Bush and President Obama though. Half of the time I couldn’t understand what Bush was talking about. I don’t think he could either.

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Donald Trump’s grammar ‘typical of children aged 11 and under’

Abraham Lincoln used the most sophisticated language in his speeches

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-elections/donald-trump-uses-language-typical-of-children-under-11-a6936256.html

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kesmarn
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Wonderful, AdLib! And I know that you’ve mentioned how often the far right tends to take your parodies and turn them into real life — or something waaay beyond real life.

And they’ve done it again!

Not only is Trump declaring that men should not be punished for assaulting women, he’s now saying that it’s the women who need “punishment”!

Yes. Women who have gotten abortions “should be punished.” How? He doesn’t know for sure. Is there a statute of limitations? We haven’t heard yet. (Look out, ladies in nursing homes! The Abortion Inquisition may be coming to a bingo game near you to do some interrogation.)

You have to wonder what the punishment will be. Stoning, perhaps? To show our superiority to those Muslims that he wants to ban from the country? A little time in the stocks? A scarlet letter?

One thing we can bet on for sure though: no male who refused to use a condom will be “punished.” After all, irresponsible sex is a 1st Amendment right — for men. (Or would that be 2nd Amendment in Trump’s case? Given his unfortunate tendency to go off half-cocked.) It’s all about “freedoms.”

But not for the little ladies. They should take their cue from Melania. Smile and stare at Donald in adoring silence. Otherwise…. there may be “punishment…” 🙁

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