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AdLib On January - 22 - 2016

Trump Palin

Unrelated to the falling global stock markets, the plunge in oil prices and pessimistic projections of the growth of China’s economy this year, Satire has declared bankruptcy, explaining that in today’s Republican primary environment, it has lost too much of its market share to Reality.

“Election years used to be boom years for us,” Satire noted. “You’d have your political cartoons with obnoxious elephants wearing stars and stripes top hats and Democratic donkeys happily kicking something over like ‘The Economy’ or ‘Our Troops’ or whatever. We’d have a Republican candidate shaking hands with a Klansman but now they can just get all that from Reality.”

Satire paused a moment to dramatically wipe a non-existent tear to ridicule it’s own self-pity.

“But today, the market for satire has been devastated by Republicans. As soon as we manufacture some new exaggerated representation of a Republican, it’s already been made obsolete because they’ve actually become it. We’re not in the reality business but thanks to these Republicans, we’ve been fending off a hostile takeover by Reality since…well…since Donald Trump joined the race,” Satire complained.

Satire sadly looked back at its long history in politics. “Remember ‘Where’s the Beef”? We made a fortune on satirizing that. And Gerald Ford being clumsy? We had separate Nixon, Reagan and Bush satire factories and thank God for Dan Quayle! Ironically, we had our biggest year in 2008 when Sarah Palin ran as McCain’s VP., we couldn’t keep the satire on the shelves! As soon as it was manufactured, out it went! But once Donald Trump burst onto the scene…our product now goes stale so fast it ends up just sitting on the shelf.”

Satire conducted a tour of its facilities and much of its massive and often ridiculous plant was idle. “We still have some clients like late night comedy shows but orders are drastically down and they mostly are interested in buying items made with the same material. The final straw for us was really Sarah Palin endorsing Trump. We leveraged ourselves big time into a Trump/Palin product line and lost everything when Reality came out with the identical product. We just can’t compete any longer with Reality so we have to close our doors.”

When asked for comment, Reality seemed more bewildered than proud about its expansion into Satire’s territories and client base.

“This wasn’t premeditated, it wasn’t part of our business plan, it just sort of happened,” Reality stated. “Personally, we’ve always gotten along great with Satire, we’ve usually attended all the elections and Kardashian plastic surgeries together among so many other things. The way it’s been, wherever I am, I’ll look around and Satire will be there, hanging out, smiling back at me while punching Al Yankovic repeatedly in the face, you know?”

Reality says it’s been trying to adapt to it’s new presence in the Republican primary. “It’s funny because on one hand, we’ve never been able to penetrate that market, we were locked out while they only contracted with Satire, Delusion and Deceit. Now all of a sudden, we’ve got Satire’s market share of the GOP. It’s a bit disorienting, especially working beside Delusion and Deceit…to tell you the truth, I’m not sure I trust them.”

Satire said it may sell off what remains of its assets to the one other outfit that is flourishing profoundly in The Year of Trump, Irony.

“We considered selling off to Reality but in the end, we thought it would be too ironic so why not cut out the middle man and sell directly to Irony?” Satire concluded.

Written by AdLib

My motto is, "It is better to have blogged and lost hours of your day, than never to have blogged at all."

30 Responses so far.

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  1. Harleigh says:

    Seriously, I am still curious as to who Trig Palins real parents actually are. I bet Tawd and Willow.

  2. Harleigh says:

    Palin -- Bachmann 2016 for jebus! Halalujer and com n git yer screech on y’all!

  3. Kalima says:

    Don’t panic satire, there are millions if not billions who get you. Look on the bright side, the repubs and far right tribes around the world will never understand you. It takes someone who can laugh at themselves and they are too humourless and too busy pointing fingers of blame while laughing at others. This too will pass when reality reigns again for America and the rest of the world. Palin, screeching aside, looked like a melting wax replica of herself. Until the GE in November I have one wish. Would someone induce a coma so that my mind stays sane enough to enjoy the humiliating defeat of the crazies in full color and stereo?

    A Trump or Cruz in your WH is a danger for all of us. I still have faith that when push comes to shove, the voters will do the right thing.

    Btw, I stepped on my glasses yesterday. It’s Obama’s fault. Something fell off the top of our fridge last night and smacked me on my shoulder. It’s Obama’s fault. It didn’t snow in Tokyo as predicted, and one of my cats peed on the carpet and it’s all Obama’s fault.

    This made me laugh out loud.


    Donald Trump stirs up the bile of the British


    • AdLib says:

      Kalima, your wisdom has inspired Satire to withdraw its bankruptcy!

      You are right, most people see what’s really going on. It’s our MSM that is making a fortune off of the Trump candidacy that is warping the reality of minor support for Trump as being more major.

      Even if he had 40% support in the GOP, only about 23% of voters are registered Republicans. So that means that in fact, only 9.2% of voters support Trump right now…and 90.8% of voters aren’t supporting Trump.

      Palin, screeching aside, looked like a melting wax replica of herself.

      What a brilliant description of Palin! Nailed it!

      It will be a bit of a grating on our patience to put up with the lunacy of the next 10 months of Trump’s campaign but as you say, when we get to the finish lines, the reward of watching the GOP blow up will be worth all of it.

      No question that Trump or Cruz winning would turn the US into a rogue state in the eyes of most of the world but that ain’t gonna happen!

      Isn’t it amazing that the GOP claims to be the party of personal responsibility yet at every opportunity, they squirm in any way they can to avoid it. Yes, Obama is responsible for everything Sarah Palin and her entire family does. I guess when they say believe in “personal responsibility”, it’s more of a conspiracy theory that involves Obama controlling them.

      Yes, I saw the Brits just savage Trump and give a preview of how the whole world would treat the US’s President if such a fool was to win. But again, he never will.

  4. Nirek says:

    It must be hard for “Satire” to stay ahead of reality.
    Palin was the begining of the end of McCain and will be for trump, too.

    • AdLib says:

      Nirek, I’d add that Absurdity is making a real move to take a lead over Reality.

      McCain will always be the Dr. Frankenstein of the GOP, he created the monster Palinstein!

  5. jjgravitas says:

    While waiting for the Blizzard of 2016 to pass, I’ve been binging on the old X-Files series. Today, the Mulder paranoia of government conspiracies producing monsters out of our citizenry seems quaint and rather funny. In our reality, it’s not the government that is producing monsters. It’s the oligarchy that is buying republicans so they can
    -- continue pumping poison into the atmosphere and into the ground, making the air unbreathable and the water undrinkable.;
    -- do what they will so that even our food is poisonous.

    Come to think of it, Mulder was right all along. I’m feeling less inclined to dig myself out of this snow. Perhaps I’ll just take pretty pictures instead.
    Good writing, Adlib!

    • AdLib says:

      Appreciate it, jj!

      X-Files is coming back, this week I think. They could really hit the nail on the head by having a theme of a wealthy pair of brothers mysteriously funding secret experiments that create monstrous versions of human beings who they run for the GOP nomination!

      Now that’s scary!

      • monicaangela says:

        To be honest Ad, I believe those billionaires are purposely trying to run the republican establishment train off the tracks so that their Tea Party Wing can complete taking over the party.

  6. monicaangela says:

    Oh how I love your articles AdLib…this is so true, and it is so hard to read because of the truth in it. I continue to wonder who is falling for this reality show. Who are these people who continue to applaud people like Donald Trump and Sarah Palin. Sad commentary that in a country of more than 300 million, this is what we get as “leaders.” How sad.

    Reminds me of this:

    • AdLib says:

      Cheers Monica!

      The MSM keeps representing the support for Trump as widespread despite the polls showing that his negatives are sky high with non-supporters. Both can’t be true and since the polls have been consistent and the results obvious (Trump has attacked and insulted everyone who isn’t a white Fundamentalist Christian man so of course most other people oppose Trump).

      I am not concerned about Trump getting sufficient support to win in a GE, without about 50% of the Latino vote and a majority of the women vote, which is impossible for him to get, he can’t win.

      I’d instead suggest that if Trump is the nominee, a wide majority Latinos, African Americans, women and younger voters will help the Dems win in a big sweep.

      Thanks for the Carlin video, really miss him, he’d be having a heyday now with Trump running and leading the GOP!

      • monicaangela says:

        Again, who owns the MSM, and what do you believe their purpose is in backing a buffoon like Trump? That’s the question. I believe this is a take over of the republican party, and they are doing it from within. The Tea Party is taking another stab at a take over of the national party, and the coup appears to be working. Who would have ever thought we would ever have a primary like this where the MSM purposes gives away air time to one candidate. Yes, I know he is making money for them, and that leads me to wonder if he isn’t getting a cut of the profits. This primary is bizarre on the republican side, and sad on the democratic side IMHO.

  7. kesmarn says:

    Stock in Astonishment and Disbelief were trading strong as of this morning, though.

    Loved this one, AdLib. Truth really is stranger than fiction, satire, or Sarah Palin.

  8. pinkpantheroz says:

    I can’t wait to see Trump GOP Inc. file for bankruptcy, only to hear Trump saying “Nothing to do with me, I just licensed my name. If it failed, it isn’t my fault.” Then walk away laughing.

    • AdLib says:

      I hear the coming GOP bankruptcy after November will be “yuuge”!

      It’s actually kind of like a pyramid scheme with Trump at the top, he gains everything and as the greedy Repub Estab begins buying in despite knowing better that this is a fraud. They deserve to lose everything to this con man.

  9. ian Anderson pegged Palin and Trump, decades ago!

  10. pinkpantheroz says:

    Stocks in Depression are beginning to skyrocket as a hedge against Reality. It is feared that, as Reality has overtaken Satire, so it will fall to Depression, as it occurs to the GOP that they can’t sell out from under the Trump/Palin landslide. On the manufacturing side, makers of Clown suits, KKK memorabilia and red noses are showing a resurgence.

  11. [img][/img]

    Oopsey Sarah!

    • AdLib says:

      KT, Sarah is right, Obama is responsible for all the decisions other people make which would include Sarah Palin saying that he’s responsible for everything so…Sarah Palin is a puppet of Obama!!!

    • pinkpantheroz says:

      Oooh, naughty girl! Did you have a long affair with POTUS, and are you admitting he’s the father of your bastard children?

  12. Parsifals says:

    Satire may still win the Oscars, if not the money, while Reality slips away, under dark, as Winter sets in and the Polls collect more Snow than Sweetgrass. :)

  13. James Michael Brodie says:

    Further poof that the GOP is a job-killing party… :-)

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