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funksands On October - 10 - 2013
Official Portrait of President Ronald Reagan

Official Portrait of President Ronald Reagan (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

“Well, thank you very much, Mr. Moderator, for this opportunity. I want to thank my opponent and the University of ________ for your hospitality.

There are a lot of points that I want to make tonight, but the most important one is that 20 years ago I became the luckiest man on earth because my wife agreed to marry me. (Laughter.) And so I just want to wish, Sweetie, you happy anniversary and let you know that a year from now, we will not be celebrating it in front of  a million people. (Laughter.)

You know, six years ago we went through the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression. Millions of jobs were lost. The auto industry was on the brink of collapse. The financial system had frozen up. And because of the resilience and the determination of the American people, we’ve begun to fight our way back.

Over the last 50 months, we’ve seen 9 million jobs in the private sector created. The auto industry has come roaring back and housing has begun to rise. But we all know that we’ve still got a lot of work to do. And so the question here tonight is not where we’ve been but where we’re going.  My opponent has a perspective on how to continue to address these problems.

I’ve got a different view. I think we’ve got to invest in education and training. I think it’s important for us to develop new sources of energy here in America, that we change our tax code to make sure that we’re helping small businesses and companies that are investing here in the United States, that we take some of the money that we’re saving as we wind down our wars to rebuild America and that we reduce our deficit in a balanced way that allows us to make these critical investments.

That said, I’ve got some very sad news for all of the voters in our state.  I wish this election was about the substantive differences between myself and my opponent.  About our differing visions of the America to come.  About our beliefs and opinions about what it’s going to take to get America back on track.  But it isn’t.

Ladies and gentlemen, I’m very sorry to announce that the Republican party can no longer be trusted.   At all.  With anything.  I feel bad for having to break this to you in this format and in front of my opponent.  I’m sure its very awkward for him/her.  I hope they don’t take it personally.  I’m sure they’re very nice, but the party he/she belongs to can no longer be trusted with the reins of government.

I used to think that starting two unpaid-for wars, exploding our deficits, and ruining our good name around the world were the worst they could do, but as we’ve all seen over the last 4 years, they’ve outdone themselves.

Since 2010, the Republican party has taken us to the brink of default twice, this last one still fresh in our minds.  They’ve shut down our government, issued 500+ filibusters, slowed down our recovery, disenfranchised voters, waged a war on women, nearly thrown the world into a new depression and voted 78 times to keep health care from 50 million of our citizens.  They have become a radicalized group bent on the destruction of the very foundations of our nation and the economy of the world to suit their own very narrow, extreme visions.

They have proven once and for all they cannot be trusted.  They will strike again.  If you elect my opponent he/she will do the bidding of the very people that want to destroy the institutions of our nation.

Unfortunately your choice is very simple.  Me or the party that has gone utterly, irredeemably mad.

Thank you.


Written by funksands

There are known knowns; there are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns; that is to say there are things that, we now know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns – there are things we do not know we don't know. Additionally there is bacon.

25 Responses so far.

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  1. Kalima says:

    Great piece funk. When you think about it, and as bad as it’s been for so many, the Teabuggers have done the Dems a huge favour. They’ve handed them the perfect campaign theme for 2014 and 2016, the shutdown and the Dept Ceiling fiasco all on one untidy plate. Bet Cruzy didn’t think further than his next election as he gave the opposition enough factual ammunition, the perfect anti-Republican vehicle to destroy his future and that of his terrorist cohorts. To any normal person, how much more embarrassing could this be? Cruzy is bright? I don’t think so. The President didn’t budge an inch, and after almost 5 years of trying to reason with them, why the hell would he?

    • funksands says:

      Kalima, thanks so much. I really hope you are right. I don’t have a lot of confidence that Democratic powers-that-be are able to recognize these opportunities when presented with them. They seem stuck in trying to deal with and compete against the GOP with a set of rules that the GOP abandoned 20 years ago.

      • Kalima says:

        Well it would be a crying shame if they didn’t jump on the chance to win back the House from these greedily insane profiteers, in fact it would be unforgivable. They need to grow a pair like Sen. Warren and Ohio’s Sen. Brown. Enough already with the protecting their own seats when some don’t even deserve to be there in the first place. The Senate/Congress needs some new blood, people who are not afraid to speak the truth. It’s about time people stopped being so complacent and actually did something for the country and it’s citizens. That is why they were elected, right?

  2. SallyT says:

    Well, there you go. (You knew that was coming, didn’t you Funkie.)

    I hope that speech will be given by many. It needs to be heard many, many times.

    I have never seen so many sick individuals as those in the Republican Party and they don’t want Affordable Care? Of course their Zombie followers are too far gone and looking for blood and even will feed on their own. But, I have faith that they are all out numbered.

    I said the other day that times change, people change, and even political parties change. Though a few may cause havoc, no few shall tear our Nation apart. For the masses hold tight around her.

    Time for the masses to start talking louder and often.

    You did good, Funkie!

    • funksands says:

      Thanks Sally. If anything good comes out of this awful mess of the last few years, let it be that the typical apathetic non-voter is motivated to get involved. (crossing fingers)

  3. choicelady says:

    Brilliant, funk! This is exactly what is needed from now through the elections.

    The GOP is the party of not just wanton spending but of utter irresponsibility in being deadbeats by refusing to pay for what they spent. THEY spent.

    They seek nothing less than the demise of federal government, and they therefore are violating their oath of office. They wish to end democracy therefore violate their oaths and their citizenship rights.

    They seek a theocracy and therefore abandon both the Constitution and the millions who do not share their beliefs.

    They espouse family values but let little children go hungry thereby harming their own constituents.

    They are mad with power, mad with misplaced anger, and mad with delusions about what America is.

    Good candidates or an insane party. If you think it’s only the ‘lesser of two evils’ when you vote, why in the world would you pick the GREATER of the two?

  4. AdLib says:

    A 10 star post, Funk! Very smart indeed.

    I am right with you, the campaign by every Dem and every Dem supporting group should express the same two things:

    1. “My opponent voted to shutdown government and supported defaulting on our debt which would have sent us into a new Great Depression.”

    2. “Whether my opponent is a viable choice for you or not, voting for him/her is voting for Tea Party control of our government, more manufactured and non-stop crises, more shutdowns and other extortion threats and a government that won’t do it’s job or lift a finger to add jobs or help Americans. A vote for my opponent is a vote for bad government.”

    I wonder if we should bring back a variation of that old anti-sex ad, “When you get into bed with any Republican, you’re getting into bed with all of the sociopathic lunatics they’re in bed with.”?

  5. SueInCa says:

    Wow Funk this is spectacular. At first I thought you were posting a speech that Obama had made and some of it resembles stuff he said in the last general election but, somehow, I doubt he calls Michelle, Sweetie lol. Oh and you forgot Medicare Part D, also never paid for and the tax breaks to the 1%. Even so, this speech delivers the point loud and clear. Had you gone into all the “shit” they have done, you would still be writing. I am sharing this on FB and Twitter.

    Kudos to you, I only wish a candidate would actually say this.

    • funksands says:

      Sue. Tell them to. I’m going to.

      • SueInCa says:

        Mine are all Dems and on my side. We have never had a Republican rep in our district here since I was old enough to know. Miller, his father, Daniel Boatwright all dems. I have Mike Thompson who is also a dem now. Should he be primaried by a Republican which is unlikely, I would certainly not feel shy about showing up at his office in Vallejo and telling him. Hell I will even go with him when he plans to say it lol.

    • AdLib says:

      Bonus points for you, Sue! Great eye!!!

      • SueInCa says:

        I didn’t test out as the Analyst for nothing. My boss used to say, uh oh here comes the Analyst, we have to be serious now. Sometimes it is not such a gift though.

    • funksands says:

      Sue, your eye is verrry discerning. The first five paragraphs are mostly lifted from the President’s opening remarks from his first debate. Wasn’t really sure how to credit him in the post w/o ruining the effect.

  6. agrippa says:

    That is a good plan. It will be effective.
    And, I do think that “get out the vote” is critical.

  7. Nirek says:

    Funk, you hit a homer! Two unpaid for WARS ! That is part of why we are in debt so much. Under Clinton we had balanced budgets and the debt was actually being paid down. President Clinton left “w” a surplus and “w” blew it and trillions more. Now they claim the POTUS is to blame for the mess.

    Loony only begins to describe them.

    • funksands says:

      Nirek, ask this of any knuckle-foamer that starts spouting about “out of control spending” or “$17 Trillion!!!”

      “That’s a lot of money. What is Obama spending it all on?”

      “Where did all of the debt come from?”

      Make them start unpacking their thoughts. Its an interesting experience.

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