GOP Apology For Being “Deceitful Corporate Puppets”

I’m still reeling from this morning’s admission by Reince Priebus, Chairman of the Republican National Committee, that the GOP is essentially “a  masquerade” with its main purpose  being to “convince people into voting for what’s worst for them but best for the wealthiest.”

Despite his vehement insistence since then that he misspoke after taking the wrong medication, the rest of his startling comments just can’t be ignored. Such as:

“That’s just the way the game is played, the means justify the ends for our party so yes, you lie when you have to, which is often.”

and

“Look, I’m sorry that to some, the GOP looks like a party of deceitful corporate puppets. It just means that we have to do a more convincing job of characterizing our agenda so that charge is easier to deny.”

And of course this final gem:

As free market capitalists, Republicans have a primary allegience to this very American system and we will always do all we can to protect it from the serious threats it faces from criticism that’s not baseless, regulations that protect people over profits and the tyranny of majority rule over our political system.

When asked why he had sodium pentathol in his posession and how he accidentally mistook it for Motrin, Priebus repeated that as a Republican he has many conspiracy theories and will try to narrow them down after the sodium pentathol wears off and he removes the lady’s thong underwear he’s wearing which is pinching him something terrible.

Happy April 1st!