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Archive for the ‘Arts & Entertainment’ Category

Posted by AdLib On Feb - 21 - 2017 15 COMMENTS

“Thank you Donald Trump, as we discussed, you and I both like to be able to feel whatever we want,” Yiannopoulos stated. “And I just love the idea of being in such a satisfying position with kids.”

Posted by AdLib On Feb - 7 - 2017 11 COMMENTS
MeaningofLife - crop

God explained that he doesn’t have a Twitter account but wouldn’t have replied to Trump anyway, saying he just found it amusing to see someone who thought he was the center of the universe.

Posted by AdLib On Jan - 12 - 2017 11 COMMENTS

Since it’s a bit hard to relate to, for those possessing a full set of teeth and a conscience, we’ve paired images of Trump and those around him with matching horror film characters that people know to help with this transition from absurdity to reality.

Posted by funksands On Jan - 9 - 2017 54 COMMENTS

Anonymous staffers have leaked the blueprints of this plan, called “The Extremely Repealed Amazing Replacement for the Freedom-Crushing Obamacare that Everyone Hates”.

Posted by AdLib On Dec - 27 - 2016 3 COMMENTS
Trump Jesus

If 2016 was personified as a human being, it would be more often referred to as an unbelievable asshole who would not be welcome back even if it came to our door with a giant box of chocolates in one hand and an eternal youth potion in the other.

Posted by AdLib On Dec - 20 - 2016 17 COMMENTS

Instead of retaining their original “happy endings” where the poor but honest or morally principled hero or heroine wins out, the new endings to Disney films will portray the villain, as the hero.

Posted by AdLib On Nov - 28 - 2016 13 COMMENTS

“We am here to stay just like first Neanderthals,” grunted Trump supporter and Newanderthal, Clyde Ham, previously explaining that part of the lifestyle includes not “con-jew-gating” verbs properly because they own the banks.

Posted by AdLib On Nov - 7 - 2016 ADD COMMENTS

It is difficult to speak with Mr. Trump, with him ensconced in his VR world of adoration, and he frequently believes he is on a stage giving a speech so is prone to calling for his virtual supporters to beat up anyone trying to interview him.

Posted by AdLib On Oct - 31 - 2016 23 COMMENTS

“We have not as yet ascertained if the ham sandwich in Mr. Weiner’s refrigerator is significant in any of our investigations but following our protocol, we have opened a secret investigation of it that we won’t tell anyone about to protect its integrity.”

Posted by AdLib On Oct - 25 - 2016 2 COMMENTS

Burnett explained, “There was no way to have a final episode of Trump’s campaign once it caught fire! We just looked at each other and said, ‘What the hell?! We’ve even called The Pope a jerk and they won’t turn against him, this is ridiculous!”

Posted by Misterbadexample On Oct - 17 - 2016 ADD COMMENTS
Planet Hospice at the United Solo Festival. Picture courtesy Lander Camarero

Let me explain. The rhetoric from mainstream climate groups (and many scientists) over the past few years has sounded something like this: ‘if we don’t seriously reduce our carbon dioxide levels, our grandchildren will be in big trouble by 2100’. With that deadline 84 years away, the tendency is to become complacent. But nearly all such assertions about a 2100 deadline are based on carbon dioxide concentrations alone.

Posted by AdLib On Oct - 10 - 2016 6 COMMENTS

“Loyalty is important to me but so is flexibility. I’ve always tried to combine the two so that my loyalty is as strong as steel but as flexible as a rubber chicken. In this way, I think I can best serve the most vulnerable and needy…meaning myself and Republicans in Congress.”

Posted by AdLib On Oct - 3 - 2016 9 COMMENTS

Captain Trump explained, “Yes, we hit an iceberg that had illegally immigrated into this part of the ocean to endanger our lives but because a ship captained by Trump is so powerful, it’s the iceberg that’s now sinking, not us.”

Posted by AdLib On Aug - 26 - 2016 8 COMMENTS
Trump Hair Leave

Trump’s hair explained, “Could I just sit around and pretend that what was going on right under my nose wasn’t happening? I’d rather dye. I’ve lived believing that you don’t judge based on one’s color and I’m not going to flip on that so I just had to give Donald a permanent wave goodbye.”

Posted by AdLib On Aug - 23 - 2016 14 COMMENTS
Zombies for Hillary

“I’m telling you, Hillary’s a full blown zombie, she eats brains! If she becomes president, look out! Do you really want a zombie for your President, I mean, come on,” Trump exhorted his white male, pale and jagged toothed audience who responded in unison chanting, “Brains!!!”

Posted by AdLib On Aug - 15 - 2016 6 COMMENTS
Trump Hat Cake

“Look, we all know that Barack Hussein Obama and Hillary Clinton are guilty for all the evil in the world today…after all, she is The Devil. Thanks to them we have ISIS, an unfair economy, irritable bowel syndrome and me as the Republican nominee, pretty terrible stuff, right?”

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