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AdLib On August - 27 - 2015

trump2

Donald Trump is a fountain of “can do” statements that some people (who are cursed with a reasoning center in their brain) are very skeptical could ever be brought to fruition. Typically, when confronted by journalists and pundits about how he will build a wall on the entire U.S./Mexico border, locate and deport 11 million undocumented immigrants back to Mexico, change the 14th Amendment, etc., his response is that he will hire some great people who will get all of his claims done.

Thanks to PlanetPOV’s investigative team who gained access to the most secure inner circle of the Trump campaign (simply by dressing in KKK hoods and sheets), we have gained access to a photo gallery of those who Trump will ask to turn his policies into reality.

DONALD TRUMP’S PRESIDENTIAL “GET IT DONE” TEAM

  

Mission 1: Build impenetrable wall along the entire border between the U.S. and Mexico.

Team Member: Pink from the movie, “Pink Floyd’s The Wall”

Pink Floyd - Nazi Meeting

Trump’s Statement: “I love this guy, he was a real inspiration for me when I was thinking about running for President and I already made him my chief campaign consultant. And he knows how to build walls that are HUGE! It’s a no brainer!”

  

Mission 2: Arrest and deport 11 million undocumented immigrants from America to Mexico.

Team Member: David Copperfield

David_Copperfield

Trump’s Statement: “Copperfield made the Statue of Liberty disappear, wish I could do that! ‘Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free?’ That giant metal immigrant, you know she’s from France, needs to be deported along with 11 million criminals and rapists from this country and Copperfield can just snap his fingers and they’ll be gone!”

 

Mission 3: Force China, Russia and Iran to agree to deals with terms that only favor America

Team Member: Dreamy, The Magic Unicorn

unicorn1

Trump’s Statement: “When you want to get something done that people say isn’t realistic, my instinct is to tell reality to go to hell. So who better to rely on in such a case than Dreamy, The Magic Unicorn. Trust me, you want China to do what we say on trade and give us our manufacturing jobs back? You want Russia to back off and get out of Ukraine when we tell them to? You want Iran to let us inspect anywhere at anytime in their country and give up all nuclear programs when we tell them to? You gotta get Dreamy!”

Written by AdLib

My motto is, "It is better to have blogged and lost hours of your day, than never to have blogged at all."

14 Responses so far.

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  1. kesmarn says:

    Terrific piece, AdLib.

    A friend of mine suggested a Mission #4. Making our military the mightiest on the planet, so no one will mess with us. For Secretary of Defense: Dick Cheney. Imagine a fully privatized military.

    Halliburton will do “very, very well,” as The Donald would say. And there’d be a whole new career for Erik Prince and a revived Blackwater/Xe operation.

    Eternal war! The route to prosperity!

    • AdLib says:

      Thanks Kes!

      Yes, that would be the most insane pick he could make, bringing Cheney on as Sec. of Defense, like giving a pyromaniac his gas can back.

      But as ignorant and hard core as Trump is and how he’s attacked Jeb, instead of going with George’s VP, I could imagine Trump going for someone that would excite his base, George Zimmerman for Sec. of Defense!

  2. pinkpantheroz says:

    Just waiting for Trump to nominate Sarah Palin as his VP!

    Reminder of his Dream Team:

    Sec. Treas. D Trump
    Sec Def. D Trump
    Sec. State D Trump
    Immigration Sec. A Hitler
    Sec. Interior G Custer
    Senior Chaplin: Westboro Baptist Church

    • AdLib says:

      PPO, now that’s a good game, figuring out Trump’s cabinet. He doesn’t really work so I don’t think he’d take all those positions…just Sec. of Treasury maybe. But…

      Sec. of State: Sarah Palin
      Sec. of Interior: Miss Universe
      Sec. of Defense: Joe Arpaio

      I would definitely buy short on America’s future if Trump had a chance of winning…but he doesn’t.

  3. Kalima says:

    The Dream Team! The A-Team?

    Trump reminds me of Kim Jung Un. Tells his people that his country’s woes are perpetrated by foreigners so he arrests those who accidentally cross his border, and spouts hate and blame on the West. Tells his people that the country is great even though millions are starving and poor. Builds a ski resort and a theme park that the majority of citizens can’t afford to visit. Convinced millions of people that he is omnipotent, can do no wrong, and jails or kills those who disagree with him. He probably refers to himself in the third person just like Trump does.

    Trump is a carnie. A circus barker. A thief of reasoning and an outright lying pos. Those who follow him are inadequately educated haters and racists. His campaign is based entirely on racism.

    The problem with America is not the immigrants, it is people like Trump and the rest of the measly bunch of hypocrites vying for the presidency, and those who blindly support them. To many repubs, apartheid would seem like such a great idea. Hey, and why not? It worked like a charm on Native Americans didn’t it?

    America’s problem is the Republican Party.

    By the time Trump starts to deflate, he will have become one of the most hated men in the country. Nice one Donald.

    Loved your picks, AdLib. Although I wasn’t familiar with the pink unicorn, it seems right up Trump’s alley of fake hair, fake persona and sewer mouth.

    —-

    Opinions
    The Trumpification of the news

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/the-trumpification-of-the-news/2015/08/26/eea4e0ae-4c27-11e5-902f-39e9219e574b_story.html

    —-

    A Deep Dive Into Trump’s Poll Numbers Shows That Most Pundits Get It Wrong.

    http://www.nationalreview.com/article/422924/donald-trump-poll-data-frontrunner-republicans

    • AdLib says:

      Kalima, hadn’t made that connection but it really works! Trump and Kim Jung Un, both tell their people complete fabrications and they all gobble it up. The difference is that Trump has no power over the country and never will…but not from the lack of trying.

      He certainly is a snake oil salesman, maybe his fellow Republican Clint Eastwood could do a little encore of this scene for him:


      BTW, glad you caught the other references but the pink unicorn was just made up, just like everything Trump says.

  4. EXFANOFARIANA says:

    Sensational….yet…up vote feature not working…Still

  5. monicaangela says:

    Two great comments from filo and gyp46, how can I add to that. Let me just say I understand perfectly what you are saying, promise them the world and if they accept your promises, take them to the cleaners.

    We must not promise what we ought not, lest we be called on to perform what we cannot. ~Abraham Lincoln

    Hypocrisy can afford to be magnificent in its promises, for never intending to go beyond promise, it costs nothing. ~Edmund Burke

    :) :)

    • AdLib says:

      monicaangela, Trump’s campaign slogan should be a WC Fields quote, “You can’t cheat an honest man, never give a sucker an even break or smarten up a chump.”


  6. gyp46 says:

    AdLib you have done it again, great post. May I add one little comment about Trumpers followers, in Yellowstone Park a comment card left by what I can only assume was a follower of ‘Trump spin’ read sorta like this:” Dear Rangers, could you please train your bears better, we came a long distance and spent a ton of money and never saw a bear, please train them to come out so the visitors can see them”!!

    • AdLib says:

      Thanks so much, gyp46!

      Yes, saw that story! Damn untrained wildlife, those Trump supporters are right!

      Hey, maybe we could send them out into the ocean to train sharks to come out so visitors can see them? Sounds like a new reality show to me!

  7. filo says:

    Spot on Ab! I’m stunned that no reporter, other than Jorge Ramos, has tried to nail down the specifics of the Prima Donald’s plan.

    I just had a scary thought. Trump delivering his first State of the Union speech before Congress.

    America! You’re welcome. Believe me, a lot of people are saying that Trump saved America, some even saying I saved the world. We are rounding up so many Mexicans that they are running for the border and they are building a wall to stop us from coming after them. Problem solved…you’re welcome America.

    I had some killer guys visit the Ayatolla. They “negotiated” with him. Yaknowatimsayin’? They are begging us to take their oil. How could I refuse? Believe me, you’re welcome America.

    You Senators and Congress people….You’re all losers. You’re wives are ugly and they are losers. You’re all fired! Believe me, the country is so grateful they have declared me Imperial Emporer.

    One more time! You’re welcome America!

    mic drop

    • AdLib says:

      filo, I think that the MSM still views Trump as an entertainer who they are a little afraid of so they won’t ask the questions of him they should. Also, it’s still Fall, what they call Silly Season, so they’re not asking the hard questions.

      They’ve been waiting for him to fade away for so long, they still don’t seem to take him seriously.

      My question is how can you take any of these Repubs seriously?

      And with Latinos, women and young voters all turned off of Trump and the GOP, Trump doesn’t have a chance of getting elected…but if he wins the Repub nom, that would be great! The Repubs would have the biggest defeat, not just for the WH but in Congress. Let the lunatics control their asylum’s leader, works for me!


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