obama hitler mind

At today’s memorial in Johannesburg to celebrate the life of Nelson Mandela, Cuban President Raul Castro shook hands with our President Barack Obama which, to anyone familiar with the social behavior of the Republican animal,  was sure to trigger the only emotion Republicans are capable of expressing besides hatred, outrage.

John McCain, had he won the Presidency,  would have used this memorial dedicated to a man who stood for peace and reconciliation to knee Castro in the balls so he responded as one would expect him to:

John McCain: “Why should you shake hands with somebody who’s keeping Americans in prison,” McCain said, adding: “Neville Chamberlain shook hands with Hitler.”

The Republican obsession with constantly connecting our first black President with Hitler, even during an event dedicated to a black man who was unfairly attacked by a group of old white men with political power, is apparently impervious to irony.

But it may not be impervious to a court summons.

A letter was publicly released today by the descendants of Adolf Hitler announcing the filing of a $100 million copyright infringement lawsuit against the Republican Party for their repeated and unauthorized use of Hitler’s name and likeness in their ongoing attack campaign against President Obama.

Here is the complete letter:

As the descendants and heirs of Adolf Hitler, we have today filed a lawsuit for an injunction and to demand financial damages in the amount of $100 million dollars against the United States’ Republican Party for the frequent and unlicensed usage of Adolf Hitler’s appearance and name.

We have exercised a great deal of patience and restraint as we watched their Tea Party protest with picket signs portraying your President Obama with the trademarked Hitler mustache and Nazi uniform and as we’ve listened to your Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh and Republican politicians claim that your President is Adolf Hitler when any historian can attest that Adolf Hitler was never elected, lived in Germany, had a much lighter skin tone and no jump shot. We believe that these statements by Republicans have confused many people as to the actual identity of Adolf Hitler which is proven by how many of the Republicans’ followers express agreement that Mr. Obama is in fact Mr. Hitler.

We are especially disappointed in the Republican Party for these actions since we have so much in common. Republicans believe in the need for the white race to be the dominant one, they work to restrain the power of the people to vote in their desired leaders, they distract the public’s anger at how unfair the economy is by blaming minorities for the majority’s ills, they have sophisticated propaganda campaigns and sponsor news outlets to promote propaganda, they support torture, they hate communists and love deadly weapons…it is bewildering to us why they have not shown us good will after adopting so many of our esteemed relative’s views.

Instead, every time your President says or does anything, it frequently elicits a claim from Republicans that he either is Hitler or he is collaborating with Hitler. We can say categorically that Adolf Hitler would never have collaborated with President Obama, he wouldn’t even watch Jesse Owens run.

Let us be clear once and for all, President Obama is not Adolf Hitler. He has nothing in common with Adolf Hitler, he is not a collaborator with Adolf Hitler and one definitive way to prove this is the death certificate in our possession that shows Adolf Hitler died in 1945 before Mr. Obama was born. And Republican claims that his death certificate is phony and that Mr. Hitler was born in Hawaii are completely false.

It is regrettable that we have been forced to take legal action against a party we are very much in sync with but we can’t allow the GOP to continue to usurp Adolf Hitler’s likeness and name. We would suggest to the Republican Party that they have their own rich history of leaders that have the kind of views and reputation they are trying to characterize by using the image of Adolf Hitler. In fact, they have many members in currently in office and in the media that echo Adolf Hitler on matters of race, male superiority and the pursuit of war instead of diplomacy.

So the next time Republicans seek to impugn the character of President Obama, may we suggest that they say something such as “That would be like Obama shaking hands with Ted Cruz,” or “Obama is Bush!”, they could accomplish the same derogatory impact while using the names and likenesses of their own members.

Sincerely,

Herman Lutz
Chancellor
Saving Hitler’s Integrity Today (SHIT)

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cal haughtly
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cal haughtly

So far, Fox news has only confirmed that Jesus and Santa Clause are white. Nothing about Hitler….I’ll wait for confirmation. Just kidding.

Quick Brown Dog
Member
Quick Brown Dog

“Peter, Fox News called. They own the copyright to Hitler’s likeness and they’re going to sue for unauthorized use of it.”

–Mr. Pewterschmidt, Family Guy “420”

VegasBabe
Member

Brilliant AdLib. I must admit, you had me going there for a minute or at least until I read the posts that followed. LMAO

jjgravitas
Member
jjgravitas

Adlib, great writing. Its probably me, but when you are writing about the republicans I am sometimes not sure if (or how much of) what you are writing is parody, as they are so often inclined to make a joke out of themselves. For example: their fight against health care, their determination to shut down the government, denial of climate change in the face of record breaking storms, their laughable attempts not to appear racist and sexist, and their naked support of the rich at the expense of the poor. Every time I think they have reached their lowest level, they manage to sink a little further.

kesmarn
Admin

Absolutely wonderful, AdLib!

I do wish that the SHIT people would have made full disclosure, though. They really should have revealed that — due to advanced scientific techniques of the early 1940s, long kept secret — Hitler had a son who still lives!

Adolph’s sperm and Ayn Rand’s ova met in a subterranean lab, some years after WWII…1970, to be exact. It was love at first sight.

The product of this affection?

Meet Little Teddy. Cruz, that is.

SallyT
Member

AdLib, this was scheduled for the Sunday Funnies but I think I will have to bring it out early. It fits too well right here!

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rambot02
Member
rambot02

Both carbon based life forms.

Both inhale/exhale on a regular basis.

Both evacuate their bowels on a semi-regular basis. (AH was on serious meds for much of his last decade so you may want to put an emphasis on “semi”.)

Both like music, although their playlists have few songs in common.

Both sneeze and sniffle when suffering from the common cold.

Kalima
Admin

AdLib, the letter from SHIT is as brilliant as it is true. I bet that Adolf is saluting them from his grave for their agenda, except for his trademark hair and moustache on a black man of course. “Sieg Heil” to the Republican Party of haters, the “real” Nazi wannabes of America.

Great read.

Quick Brown Dog
Member
Quick Brown Dog

Sieg Heil! *pfft* Sieg Heil! *pfft* Right in the Baggers’ face!

–Spike Jones

Nirek
Member

Ad, you have outdone yourself! My favorite part was at the end. “Saving Hitler’s integrity today (SHIT)” Just too funny!