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AdLib On September - 21 - 2009

Fire_breathing_20060715_7007_collien 2We Americans are being very wasteful with our natural resources of emotional energy. This is causing a slew of problems affecting our environment including adding a great deal of additional CO2 into the atmosphere,  pollution of political discourse  and a shortage of positive emotional energy.

I think the time has come for us to take action. For those who ask, “What can I do to conserve emotional energy and reduce Global Flaming?”, I have put together the following list of things you can do in your daily  life and your community that can make a difference and reduce our dependency on senseless and contrived emotional fuel:

What You Can Do to Reduce Global Flaming

1. Substitute organic music of your choice  for the artificial news in the MSM (listen to Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side of the Moon” when you watch Fox News or CNN, you’ll find it syncs up perfectly, especially on the songs “Money” and “Brain Damage”).

2. Plant a Birther.

3. Instead of arguing obviously fictional charges made against Health Care Reform, Financial Reform, etc., carry a large mallet around and conk Republicans on the head until they announce they’re running for office in South Carolina or Minnesota.

4. Create rolls of toilet paper out of The New York Post.

5.  Unscrew the thought light bulbs from Republicans and replace them with squashes.

6. Recycle old condemnations of racists from the 50’s and 60’s.

7.  Use the additive “Where’s My Asshat?” as a middle name for wack Republican talking heads and politicians to get better mileage (i.e., Michele “Where’s My Asshat” Bachmann, Glenn “Where’s My Asshat” Beck).

8. Instead of driving reason home with Republicans, walk or bicycle it (for them, the slower the better).

9. Don’t leave the blather running when brushing off brainwashed right wing tools, just shut them off by twisting their very tiny spigot.

10.  Reduce toxic emissions, seal Rush Limbaugh’s mouth with a catalytic converter.

Working together, we can reduce and hopefully reverse the negative impact on us and our nation that this crisis of Global Flaming has been wreaking. We can protect the environment of productive political conversation and genuine desire for social progress by conserving our emotional energy.

Turn off that right wing talking head that keeps running off at the mouth with insanity, recycle your disgust or outrage and use them wisely to contact your representatives and progressive organizations,  save energy by not bothering to debate that Republican in your family into thinking for themself (just give them a copy of “Idiocy for Dummies” for Christmas).

Written by AdLib

My motto is, "It is better to have blogged and lost hours of your day, than never to have blogged at all."

9 Responses so far.

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  1. KevenSeven says:

    Excellent, and practical!

  2. Kalima says:

    Plant a Birther sounds like something I might be good at. All of my plants survive on a mixture of rotten egg shell in water. The pungent sulfur aroma should prepare them for the place reserved for them after they leave this earth.

    After the recent 9/12 march on Washington, the CO2 levels rose to new heights.Observed from a recent satellite photo, a huge yellow cloud was discovered hanging high over the capitol, described by experts as a methane gas explosion mixed with a so far unidentified substance. Beware fellow space travelers and remember to wear your helmets and rubber gloves!!

  3. KQuark says:

    😆 President Obama was right the biggest danger to this country is the Cold Civil War that keeps on raging on and has gotten exponentially worse since the advent of right wing radio and Faux News. You simply have a minority of people that would rather destroy the other side than make the country better. We all know primitive parts of their brains are driving them but they just rationalize those impulses as reason.

    For the most part there is not much we can do but push real issues even if it does get drowned out. The ironic part is the same people literally crying sometimes that President Obama or Democrats are destroying their country ARE the actual people destroying America.

    • AdLib says:

      Yep, the irony is that the Repubs know that taking steps that destroy the country are horrible…so they take these steps but try to hide them behind their accusations that Obama is doing what they are.

      That’s very Rovian, take your weakness and project it onto your adversary (remember Bush attacking Kerry on his military record?).

      They are a cancer in society and our political system needs the same kind of reform we’re trying to pass on health care, so we can get the GOP surgically removed from doing further harm to the public “body”.

  4. Questinia says:

    Republicans are primarily emotional. Look at Boehner. Look at Limbaugh. People are both drawn and afraid of histrionics. Much like many actors and actresses, they suck the oxygen out of the air. One wonders how flames can exist without oxygen. So, it seems that these people are, by deduction, fire-breathing Satanic dragons with brimstone lungs, ice floe hearts, and the emotional centeredness of grieving Albanian women.

    • AdLib says:

      Yep, they have the emotional faucet turned on and the intellectual faucet is rusted shut.

      Flames can exist without oxygen for Republicans because they don’t believe in science. They can also turn reform into whine.

      Love the metaphor of them! May I add another to the list?

      I see them as spoiled babies. They want what they want and don’t care for/are incapable of providing much complex reasoning for it. They cry when they don’t get what they want, they throw tantrums to try and get what they want and most of all, when it comes to satisfying their appetites, they suck.

      • Questinia says:

        They want what they want when they want it is another way of describing addictive behaviors. The translation of substance addiction to bible and religion is a shifting of one addictive behavior to another, or cross-addiction. Fear and dependency are the underpinnings.

        More proof of their non-scientific powers. Ever notice how those early morning evangelical Bible interpreters have coffee mugs they never drink from and that are perpetually steaming? Those things defy the laws of thermodynamics. Probably contain a little cup o’ hell.


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